Birth story

Max arrived on 07.08.09 via a C Section. It was not what I had planned but my only concern was his well being.

We were scheduled for an induction on the evening of the 6th. The induction was required because Max hadn't dropped at all. My fluid levels were low and I noticed a decrease in fetal movement in the past week.

So....I arrived at the Clinique and they deposited two pills. One at 8 and one at 12am. Nothing really happened. There was not much progression/dilation so they started the Pitocin drip around 8am. I wanted to try to do this birth naturally but with the strength of the contractions caused by the pitocin it was impossible. I was asking for the epidural by 10am and quite frankly I am suprised that I lasted that long. The doctor checked on me a few times and by 2pm still no real progress. The monitoring showed that Max's heartbeat was strong but there really wasn't much movement so it was time to make a call. He said that we should do the C section and get Max out now while he was still doing well.

By 3pm I was prepped and in surgery. I have never been so scared in my life. In the back of my mind I had a notion that a C Section would be necessary and L and I discussed that if it was - then it had to be done. Everything happened so quickly though - I barely had time to mentally prepare for the procedure. I was whisked into the operating room. There seemed to be at least 10 people running around prepping me, and things in the room. Everyone was speaking very quickly (in French) and I started to panic. The began to give me the anesthesia and it made me very foggy. I had a difficult time hearing and had an oxygen mask on so I had a difficult time speaking as well. When I couldn't hear the doctors asking me questions I then really started to freak out. I cried and couldn't stop. As soon as that happened everyone stepped back a bit, slowed down, and tried to calm me down. Lars was in the room as well which helped.

(The Swiss are funny people but I have learned while here that the way to get them to be nice to you is to break down and cry. It's amazing how much they change when they see you cry).

By 3.22pm little Max was born. They showed him to me but then had to take him away to be checked. L went with him so that he wouldn't be alone. I was put into a recovery room for about 1 hour 30 minutes but L made sure that they brought my baby to me so that I could try to breast feed him and bond a little bit before they had to take him away again. After the recovery room I was put into my own room and the IV's etc stayed in me until the next day.

I am so happy that we have our baby boy but I must admit that I really missed that initial bonding period that we would of had if I had given birth naturally. L was the one that spent time with him and gave him his first bath the next day because I was unable. I didn't even see his little toes and bum until day two. We are making up for lost time now but I still can't help feeling like I lost out on something. I just keep reminding myself that the C section was indeed necessary - he had the cord wrapped around his neck and would of never of come out otherwise.

It's been very hard dealing with the pain of the operation and giving birth - not to mention being in the Clinique away from home. The first few days were overwhelming to say the least. Now things are starting to settle down (my emotions included) and I am looking forward to going home tomorrow.